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Monday, October 7, 2013

More God in More Moments

Making frame with songs hummed because there are no lyrics and with lyrics waiting for a tune. Making frame for missing pieces and pieces fitting just right. Frame with in-between beats and with sun light lying down tired at summer end. With leaves rolling out red carpet for autumn’s fame.  Making frame for prayers groaned because there are no words…and can “Ohh!” and eye smiling delight amazed be frame too?

Redeeming time.

Saving up moments.

Making frames with them to know more God in them.

More God moments.

More God in husband striding through the front door on long legs to kiss me in the kitchen moment. More God in daughter making me nervous behind the wheel with driver’s permit in pocket moment. More God in daughter-college-girl framing words between laughter over the latest moment. More God in man-son and husband for six months, sitting so comfortable familiar at kitchen table I nearly forget he has a place of his own and won’t be staying for dinner moment. More God in life saved up one day at a time.

More God in the framework of moments. Because He says He is good. And I need more good in more moments.

I am trying to redeem time because God is good and how else will I know He is good than in the framework of moments saved up? In hammering moments together and pasting those too fragile for nails. And making frames with them to know more God in them?  

It’s not without effort to save up moments. To be open-eyed searching aware. To take my own thoughts captive and reign in wild-horse emotional stampedes. And how much time is redeemed when I keep the bit in my mouth and how many moments are saved when I keep eyes focused straight, up and ahead? I’ve heard said that when we look down there is no peripheral up, but when we look up we see everything. That’s good to remember in my effort to save moments, to make frame with them and focus on more God in them. It is intentional because it is must-need.

Must-need.

More God.

An unexpected moment today. Well, not unexpected exactly. Hoped for. A hummingbird, blue-gray. Silly. But I admit asking God for a hummingbird. I did. Last week. And not because I have some sort of hummingbird fascination. I don’t.

But I do have fascination with knowing more God in moments saved up. I have fascination to see the portrait of His character displayed at center of frames hammered and pasted out of moments saved up. And I need to see what it looks like to be still and focused when whir hums in circles all around me.

Is it possible? Is it possible to be held still, not in spite of but because of… turbulence?  Held still because of the dynamic of pressure and flurry, all feathers flying? Held still because my heart is pumping two-hundred feathery beats per second? Because my thoughts are flying forward, backward, sideways and even upside down at sixty miles per hour? It is possible. I know because God made hummingbird just that way.

I am desperate to see that He cares. That He is kind. That He is good in the framework of this flap and blur.

Desperate to see His love for me in the little things.

Desperate to see what it looks like to drink the sweetness right out of Him. Nectar of strength.
 
 















I wept when I asked God to see this. “It would just be nice, God. That’s all,” deepest must-need perched fragile there at bedside on feet delicate, knowing that it’s too late in the season. But knowing also that God is not bound to seasons and that I live both in and out of season.

It’s wild.

This overcast, misty, fifty-five degree October morning, I saw flit. Yes, dart between peach tree leaves turning yellow. Grey-blue. Again! Through frame of window at sink. Twice! And the hover, the sip over single rose on bush of rebel heads.

 

 




 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

  The moment. Framed with rose shadow.

“Take rebel thoughts captive,” comes to mind as I watch the sip with Ohh and Eye Smiling holy prayer. Yes, take them captive and turn them as wing inverted to hover still amid blur.

And sip long sweet nectar of God.

All is frame for this. It is possible. Moments saved, time redeemed, life saved up one day at a time are framework to know More God.

It doesn’t always look so. Doesn’t always make sense. Often feels backward to frame God at all.

But He is main focus and life is mere frame.

And it is the only way I know to know more God. I invert the flight and flap of my thought pattern. Turn thought at angle. And know more God in more moments.

This is why I look for frame.

To know more God.

 
written by: Carolyn Roehrig

 

 

 

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